Its not that I don't believe in you.
I just don't want to.
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The name is Erika Airi. Age: 18 Random annoying meido. Could be shy sometimes. If you're lucky. I'm mostly ignorant. So if you're too dramatic, stay away from me before I get really annoyed and toss an ice-floss at your face~ :D I'm in love with COSPLAY. It sets me upright. Eventhough I don't really think I'm quite upright. More to downleft or something xD I love my violin, is a shotaaaa~, punky cuteness~ Like friendly people, like hugsssss~~~White, Pink and Gray. A little bit of Black and Green. Not much of Purple. Yarizakura. Don't need to know what it means. I just felt like putting it there.
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Wednesday 15 May 2013, @ 21:34
Not so fresh start.
I woke up due to the sound of movement. Someone who was beside me grumbled.
I yawned while trying to get up. My whole body hurts. My muscles felt sore. I half open my eyes cause it still takes a lot of effort to see properly. The person who was digging the trash besides me held something that looks like a half eaten chicken and held it possessively. He glared at me and muttered something like, "My trash."
I ignored him and scanned my surroundings. My eyes were a bit blurry and my head is still spinning. Looks like a dark alley. I'm not even sure what time of the day it is. Even my memories are a bit foggy. What had happened?
I tried standing up and at the same time, I looked down towards my pants. It looks worn out and torn everywhere. Am I in a rock band? I brightened up until I caught the smell of myself. Ugh I smell like a rotten papayas. My hair looks like a wig. All tangled up and shit. Like I have never combed in my whole life. I also think that my shirt used to be white. It doesn't look white at all now. I didn't know how I could bear and live with it. Omg. Was I a hobo? I touched my greasy skin. All sticky. Ew. What the hell? Had I never taken a shower? I couldn't remember anything at that.
I started towards the dark road. My legs were shaky as heck. Maybe I slept for a thousand years. Or maybe, I am actually a zombie. That explains everything.
Just when I was really sure I was a zombie, a car stopped next to me.
It was all black, even the windows are tinted black. The window closest to me rolled down.
"I was told to escort you back."
I grabbed the door handle and sat inside without any second thoughts. Might as well right? I'm a zombie anyway.
♥baby don't you hit my heart
@ 21:34
@ 21:34
Tuesday 14 May 2013, @ 22:16
Prologue
Relationship status: In a relationship with an unknown existance.
I'm hopeless. I sighed to myself.
Everybody from MHA has moved on to the real world and I'm still holding on to something that I am unsure of it's existence. Seeing, life flowing out of me everyday is unbearable. I stared a 100 miles away out from my balcony. What is the meaning of learning everything about you, finding who you are, finding everything that makes you happy, learning how to trust, learning the depth of friendship, meaning of sacrifice.. When you will eventually cease to forget? What is the meaning of the existence of MHA?
Eventhough they had explained it countless of times, where you will know how to control your abilities in human world eventhough you won't remember that you had it.
I stretched out my wings. The one that used to be a hasslenow glimmered in its white brilliance. I grazed the soft feathers that has now become a part of me.
I couldn't imagine living without it.
All the effort to learn. Forgetting is like losing everything that you have gained. Was I willing to lose all that?
Truth is, nobody can escape going to the real world. During graduation, I teleported myself out from the academy and Aiko caught me in time to be teleported with me. She stayed for a while for me. Comforting me. We finally had a girl time without getting interrupted by anyone at all. Just two of us. After a few month, I could feel that she longed to moved on. She missed her Hiro. Who am I to take away her happiness just because I was unhappy? I told her to go but she refused to go without me. She's the best friend I have ever had, how can I just hold her back like that?
So one day, I created a lie and told her that I was ready to go. I pushed her into the portal and ran away. What coward I am. She'll probably get mad at me and scream at me when she sees me. Oh. But she'll probably not. Not that she can remember anyway.
I don't understand why I am unable to let go. I'm still hoping--Everyday-- that maybe he will come back to me. But I haven't seen him for.. as long as I could remember. I refuse to think of death.
'Take a chance' A voice deep inside of me spoke.
A phrase that I had almost forgotten about. The phrase that I used to encourage people.
It hit me hard in the gut. I couldn't. I just couldn't. I need all my memories intact. Memories of everyone. My feelings. Kaz. I blinked to myself.
All this while, I was just waiting for him. He'd never come back. Even once. Like he used to.
Silent tears trailed down my cheeks as I crumbled.
So empty.
So alone.
'How can you fly without love?'
I do have love. I'm holding tight to it.
'Love does not wait for you.'
What was that supposed to mean?
So miserable.
So..youthless.
Yes I'm losing my youth.
I was holding on to my amulet on my chest.
My colourless amulet.
The one that used to have a deep shade of life.
'Your love does not exist in this world, and you knew it'
Of course. The amulet has been dull for quite a while now. I just refuse to believe.
I blinked a few more tears before taking a deep breath.
"Light." I called out in the silence. "Protect me."
The amulet gleamed and light starts coming out to engulf my entire being in a slow motion. I held my amulet tight to my heart.
I have made my choice.
"To the portal." Words left my lips and everything became dark.
The last thing I saw was just this one thing,
A flash of hope.
♥baby don't you hit my heart
@ 22:16
@ 22:16
Wednesday 12 December 2012, @ 19:25
I am Airi. Everything I do, sometimes there's a reason to it, sometimes I don't even know where I'm going with this. Hate hate hate to follow orders. I'm rebellious. But I'm still standing on Earth's ground. I know what's good and what's not for me. I am myself. I don't like to be compared. I am also 18. People seems to forget that. I'm still a child, I'm still a kid. So stop going all pedophile on me then complain about the flat-ness of my boobs and my butt. Who are you to judge other people when you yourself aren't even that perfect. I love kids and love grandmas. They're just sooooo adorable. I could be really nice or really mean to you. Depending on my mood. I get annoyed by almost every single thing and every single gesture. I'm still trying to control it but seriously. When I'm annoyed i think it's quite obvious on my face. So stop bothering me.
♥baby don't you hit my heart
@ 19:25
@ 19:25